Friday, December 28, 2007

Who Buys Stamps?

This is my third entry of the day - I'm on a roll! Don't forget to read the first two regarding Caligula and Spicy Chicken.

I did something I rarely do today. I typed up a letter of complaint.

My Lane Bryant account has been past due for 10 days, which is bad, I know, but they've been fucking me over. I like to pay everything online, but since they changed their credit company, I haven't been able to log on to my account. Since I refuse to pay by phone, I waited it out. I finally paid today, but wrote the following letter immediately afterward. Enjoy!

December 28, 2007

Customer Service
PO Box 84073
Columbus, GA 31908-4073

Credit Card Inquiries/Disputes
Spirit of America National Bank
PO Box 580
Milford, OH 45150-0580

Dear Sir or Madam:

I want to thank you for making the recent changes to Lane Bryant’s banking institution; hopefully switching to a 16-digit account format will work well for Charming Shoppes and its new customers in the future.

I have been a loyal Lane Bryant customer for nearly ten years, and I write now with a slight critique of the complications that the switchover in banking systems – while necessary – has caused.

I prefer making payments online. This is a convenient feature for everyone who doesn’t have the time to make their way over to an LB store or care to sit through a lengthy automated call which – annoyingly enough – is rife with time-wasting advertisements. I know about Right Fit jeans and career wear. I’m fat; I’m going to keep shopping at Lane Bryant, so don’t worry about me.

However, since the changeover, I have not been able to make payments online. In order to continue accessing my online account, I need a 16-digit card number to re-subscribe. Since a new card was never mailed to me, I haven’t been able to log on.

I emailed customer service earlier this month to assist me with the problem, but for my credit security, I was directed to call 1-800-888-4163 for personal assistance. When I called the number, I was informed that due to technical difficulties, I could not reach a customer service representative. I called again this morning, and still no human could be found.

As a result, I have had to pay my credit account over the phone for these past few months. This normally wouldn’t be a big deal, but each time I am charged a convenience fee of $5.00. This makes no sense to me. Your pay-by-phone system is automated, and like the online payment option, requires little human capital on your part to process my specific payment. I make the entries. I spend the time. So why do I get charged $5.00 for doing something that I would rather do online anyway?

In short I would appreciate it if at least one of the following actions were taken:

  1. Send me a new Spirit of America card so that, at the very least, I can retain my online payment account.

  2. Make the proper adjustments so that 9-digit LB Card cardholders can continue to make online payments.

  3. Credit the $10.00 I have spent on pay-by-phone inconvenience fees to my account.

  4. Eliminate the $5.00 phone payment fee altogether.

  5. Create a secure email address for credit disputes and inquiries. This is the digital age; who buys stamps?

Thank you for your time. If you have any questions or require further information, please do not hesitate to call me at xxx-xxx-xxxx or email


Laura R. Meyer

So there's that,


1 comment:

J said...

But laura, forever stamps are...forever. it's your way to beat the postal service, literally, forever.