Wednesday, July 23, 2008

I'm Back, Baby!

So yeah, me no writey in a week.  GET OVER IT!
Just kidding.  Don't get over it.  Hold the resentment close to your heart until it courses bitterly through your veins.
There have been some new developments in the past week:
  1. I have a tight vag, but you know that.  I've embraced it, and I think it's really funny...when it's not.
  2. I talked to my Mom last week to find out once and for all if she had breast cancer when I was a kid.  When I was in the first grade, I remember she had to come up to Chicago for some tests.  I remember bringing my white Marshall Field's teddy bear to her and laying with her in bed, scared that she was sick.  Thankfully, her tumors were benign; they would return every few years since then.  I wanted to know for my own medical records, and we ended up having a long talk about women's health - the kind of talk we didn't have when I was going through puberty.
  3. During this talk, we came upon the subject of menopause.  She admitted that she had gone through the worst of it, and when I asked her when that was, she said this:  "Oh you remember - that was when I went all crazy and divorced Dad."  Which MEANS she kind of owned up for being a raging bitch over the last few years.  Hmmm...a good thing?
  4. I met a guy.  Upside?  He like, likes me.  Downside?  He has an accent like Yakov Smirnov.  Everytime he talks I think, "In Soviet Russia, CAR drives YOU!"  It's not really a downside; it's kind of cute.  He's Moroccan...and swell.
  5. I lost 3 lbs, gained them back, and lost them again.
  6. I've been sticking to my workout schedule.
  7. I won a party at Howl at the Moon Piano Bar!
  8. I made tabouli for the first time.  It's pure magic.
  9. I'm going to see The Dark Knight tonight with Yakov.
  10. I think I'm travelling home over Labor Day weekend!  Weeeee!
So there's that,


manda said...

Welcome back!! Thanks for the updates. Let us know how The Dark Knight is...

mkieper said...

Mike saw the Dark Knight last night, and said it was the best Batman movie ever. Not something for kids though. Lots of torture and mental violence. So of course I can't wait to see it.

Glad you are back baby, I miss you. Not sure if there is going to be a Hog Roast this year, but I'm sure there will be some sort of gathering for sure.

ShanaRose said...

Hey, dang! I've missed a lot while being away frolicking and wearing doublets! (not really, doublets are for men)